I’ve been putting off writing this for a while now. every time I’ve tried to get the words out of my head, they’ve fluttered away, or remained annoyingly inert, like a pigeon with boundary issues. I told myself that they would come when I was scared enough. I think that time is now.
I’m coming back to America.
I don’t know for how long I will be ‘back’. I plan to spend around 6 months bouncing around, but that could change drastically. I plan to reevaluate my situation at the end of the year, and then decide accordingly based on where I’m at.
my loving wife Carina (and our two adorable kitties) will not be coming with me. for reasons that I’ll let her explain, she needs a bit more stability in her life at the moment.
I have given up my job at Maxomedia. it is with a heavy heart that I bid farewell to the myriad of wonderful people that I’ve had the pleasure of working with. I cannot begin to express how thankful I am for the opportunities afforded to me, and to the welcoming environment that remains even in my absence. I will miss every last one of you. getting to know all of you has been a wonderfully rewarding adventure, and the door to wherever I call home is always open to all of you.
I will be leaving most of my earthly possessions here in Switzerland. I will be living out of a (large) backpack as I make my way. within reason, I am willing to lend out my things to those who are interested – but obviously, Carina gets first dibs. so far, my bass and my mammoth computer are spoken for.
indeed, I will be traveling about quite a bit, but I will also be in need of places to live in cities I stay longer in. most notably Chicago, but also the San Francisco Bay Area of California. if you, or someone you know, has any kind of inside lead on a room / studio for rent, I would be immensely appreciative.
while I will be spending as much time as humanly possible on my projects – assuredly, more time than I am spending now – I will also be accepting contracts for spec work when needed. I don’t like to brag, but I’m one of the best front end developers out there, and a damn good web / interaction designer to boot, replete with references from international clients on both ends. I’m not cheap, but I’m worth it. if you, or anyone you know, is in need of some heavy lifting, let’s get in touch. my portfolio begins here.
the question on most people’s mind, is why. there are, from my perspective, two main reasons.
I build things. I’ve built my own evernote, my own google translate, my own google search, my own about.me, my own blog, my own portfolio, not to mention a phalanx of other smaller bits and pieces. I’ve been working four days a week for the past few years – working evenings, fridays and weekends on my projects – but it’s not enough. I want to throw myself completely and entirely into my work. I want to live it, to embody it, to become it, to grow it. the list of things I want to make gets longer by the day – to say nothing of the projects I want to collaborate on with those few brave souls – and there is never enough time. now, there is.
the other reason is more personal. every time I return from visiting my motherland, I am plagued by what I’ve left behind. it subsides after about a week or two, when the wonder and whimsy of the world around me reveals itself once again. the last time I was back in the states was over thanksgiving 2014 for a surprise visit; and the creeping feeling of dread has yet to leave me. my brother is graduating high school. I’ve been away for all of that colossally influential period. my parents, while they have quite a bit of fight left in them, are getting older. 2014 was a curious year in that it saw a staggering amount of people I’ve been close to departing this world – but its a sobering reminder of the fleeting moments we still have.
which brings me to my ultimate goal. however lofty, or presumptuous, or arrogant, or pompous it may be: I do not want either of my lives to go unattended. I want to be able to service them both. I so deeply cherish both of them, and I do not want either of them to fester. not without me, anyways. I have no idea what this towering ideal practically looks like. perhaps I am doomed to forever be a cat on the wrong side of the door. but by damn, I have to try. there is no other option.
thank you for indulging me. I hope to see you along the way.
mike